(Original article at Beer Fuck)
Fuck Fear and Fuck Bear?
No, beer fuck is not about getting drunk and fucking ugly girls. That's what people think BEER FUCK is all about. Beer fuck is about all of you beeraholic perverts out there who would actually want to fuck beer if you could!
I bet you remember all those funny quotes on "why beer is better than woman". Sadly, till now the last argument was always on female side: "you can't fuck the beer, right?". Well it's not like that any more!
The good news is - now you can fuck beer in the ass, pussy or mouth!!! Yep, the SLUT BEERS have been invented. You gotta love 21st century and Fleshlight company that invented beer fuck!
Bad new is - you'll have to pay for it... But that is the problem with beer anyway, no matter if you drink it or fuck it...
Beer for Fuck
Do you like draft beers? You gonna love SLUT BEERS as well!
I bet you haven't seen these brands before...
Let me introduce you to three new, perfectly fuckable beer brands on the pic (from left to right):
1. Sukit Draft - unlike most of the women, this beer is always in a mood to give you blowjob. No kidding. Read on...
2. Lady Lager - a beer with silky soft pussy ready for sex at the snap of your fingers!
3. O'Doyle's Stout - unique, tight ass hole beer waiting to get rammed any time you want.
If you are still wondering WTF I'm talking about here, it's time you get familiar with SLUT BEER anatomy. Let's look at those beer cans from above:
Wanna pound one? |
All three orifices (butthole, mout and pussy) are made from Real Feel Superskin®, a closest thing to real human skin know to modern science. Combined with the original accessory water based lube that simulates pussy juice and saliva, these babies will make you cum like real female mouth, vagina or ass would do.
Blowjob Beer
Buy yourself a blowjob beer HERE!
Molded from real woman mouth and lips and incredible life like artificial skin, this blowjob beer toy will play around your penis like real mouth would do leading you to orgasm.
The inner texture used for this model is specially designed to simulate mouth, tongue and cheek mucosa.
The inside surface of the mouth is designed to give you feeling of sperm swallowing during orgasm and deep throat cock experience.
Beer Pussy
Buy yourself a beer pussy HERE!
Imagine beer well inside real vagina... What a wonderful world this could be! A beer pussy for fuck is deadly realistic for both your penis and tongue! You can even drink beer from it if you want to! As you can see, it features all elements of real vagina (clit, labia) while the inside surface (pic bottom) is designed for tight and more sensible experience. The overall feeling of realistic intercourse is simply amazing but don't worry - it doesn't stay pregnant! Luckily, that part is not built in...
Beer Ass in the Can
Buy yourself a beer ass HERE!
Just look at that tight butthole that craves ramming! It's been molded from real woman ass while the inner surface is uniquely produced for tight ass fuck feeling. I bet that you can't last more than five minutes so be generous with lubricant for extended pleasure!
Again, this is another extremely realistic product and the only problem I see with this beer ass in the can is that it doesn't smell bad...
So, if you're into forbidden pleasures, just enter the dark zone, but I warn you - you will last less than a beer!
CHEERS!
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